Yep, that’s yours.

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10 Responses to Yep, that’s yours.

  1. Dr. Rob says:

    As a long-time bearded one, I can say that this is absolutely wrong. It SHOULD say: “Food found in hair.”

  2. Yoko says:

    Damn! Dr. Rob beat me to it!
    Great as always!

  3. Jeet says:

    The graph should start with a slight y offset to cater to clean shaven guys and girls who still manage to find hair in food ;-)

  4. Dave K says:


  5. Eli says:

    This is why I shave the middle part; even sideburns as ginormous as mine are not nearly as prone to food collection/pollution.

  6. Svenn Diagram says:

    This is rank pogonophobia! That you should be trafficking in such hurtful stereotypes in this day and age is extremely disheartening.

  7. Stripe says:

    All of which is why I have just invented the Facenet(TM). It works just like the food industry standard hairnet, but fits over the entire face like a giant nurse’s mask, with a small hole over the mouth.

    Now, even ZZ Top can dish up at Jimmy’s Buffet, without sharing their hair with the other all-you-can-eaters.

  8. Jeffrey says:

    @stripe: check the patent office, beardnets have been industry standard in several states for years. Or watch Unwrapped on the food network. I recall Costco requiring them for thier food service workers in 2002.

  9. Stripe says:

    Sorry, Jeff, I don’t watch TV, but I’ll take your word for it. Phooey! There goes my cushy, beard-padded retirement… alas, the perils of Prior Art. Back to the old drawing board, I guess.

  10. Thomas says:

    isn’t the inverse also true? length of beard vs food found in hair?